The "A" Word

And I don't mean Adultery, although that wouldn't have been an unreasonable assumption. This morning I was feeling a bit spunky, so I texted my wife (still out of town) that her "ass looked really good in the yoga pants [she] wore on the airplane." Seemed fun, playful, and a bit rowdy, all of which would be welcome additions to our sex life (or "physical intimacy," in my wife's jargon). If you've read any of my posts and know anything about her attitudes toward anything coital that isn't hermetically sealed, it probably won't surprise you that it's now approaching midnight and I have yet to get a response from her.

This began to annoy me a bit as I was touring a house this evening on the way home from work. The sellers' agent (a few but not too many years older than me) started looking more and more attractive the longer we were alone together in the house. It wasn't until we were exploring the recesses of the basement that it dawned on me what a potentially compromising situation we were in. I vented by lingering in the master walk-in closet and running my fingers over a lacy teal bra that was partially tucked underneath some jeans. While aware that it crossed a line of some kind, I did it without hesitation, seeing it as a relatively benign--albeit admittedly somewhat perverse--way to cope with the swirling sentiments. But I remained agitated about the stiflingly narrow boundaries of sexual expression in my marriage, anticipating that at best it would remain the same, but more likely it would narrow progressively in the years to come -- until eventually, well, after a few more years there would be no coming.

At home this evening, #1 had gone to a movie with my parents, #s 3 & 4 were in bed, so I purged by playing an epic Monopoly game with #2. Lasted nearly 3 hours. We had a blast. He was vibrant and engaged, and is a surprisingly aggressive little capitalist and good mathematician for a first grader. Another priceless evening with him. I direly need to spend more time with these kids (Did I mention that this morning I cleaned up a poop explosion from #4 that went all the way up his back and into his hair?), and suspect that more time with me might not be bad for them, either.